Marital Intimacy

Children should be learning about marital intimacy.  When they ask questions, parents should answer them in a way that the child knows he can come and ask them more questions as they arise.  They should be taught that certain things are only okay IN marriage. 

Most of the world believes that you can have sex with whoever you want, wherever you want, and whenever you want.  In class last week we learned about the emotional damaging effects of sex before marriage.  You cannot have the full bonding experience without the commitment behind that.  It can be a means of strengthening a marriage relationship and should not be defiled by the world.

Preparing for a Marriage

This week we learned about the process to marriage:

• Dating  {a lot of different people in a lot of different situations}
• Courtship  {being exclusive, but you still do so in a lot of different situations}
• Engagement  {letting the world know you are getting married- a time to plan wedding AND marriage}
• Marriage  {not just the wedding day}

The most fascinating thing I learned this week was about courtship.  I guess I knew that we still "court," but we are always so vague about it.  If we called it courting, we would probably think about boyfriend/girlfriend relationships a bit differently.  I have never had a boyfriend because I have always been taught that you aren't exclusive until you are ready to prepare for marriage and think that it could possibly be with that person. 

During courtship is when you should start asking serious questions.  Questions about their dreams, their fears, their plans, their family, their envision of a future family, etc.  Courtship is a big deal that should be taken more seriously in the world.

DATING!

I just love reading stuff about dating.  It's not because I'm some boy-crazy little girl.  When we talk about real dating where you plan, prepare, and pay, that is when I like talking about dating.  My favorite dates haven't been where a guy spent so much time meticulously planning something or paying some extravagant amount of money.  My favorite dates have been when they're at least a little thought out and we do something together where we can talk comfortably.

We talked about doing a variety of dating.  In that way you can get different perspectives of the individual you are dating.  Bro. Williams showed us some pictures that looked very different depending upon where you were sitting in the classroom.  It was funny to hear how people were describing it and then seeing all of our shock when he changed the angle of the picture.  I think that is the key right there.  If we don't date in a variety of settings and activities, we will be shocked at some of our spouses characteristics when we get married.

Gender & Flowers

I love flowers.  I love taking pictures of flowers.  I love receiving flowers.  All of my notes from class have flowers along the sides and it seems to be the only thing I can doodle. 

I know this is weird but as we were discussing gender roles, I've thought about why I draw flowers and take pictures of so many.  Is it because they're "girly" or is it because I consider them one of God's most delicate creations?  As a girl, was I encouraged to love flowers?  If I was a boy, would I draw them all over?  I don't think I would. 

The funny thing about that is that flowers aren't necessarily feminine.  One time a guy told me that a girl gave him flowers and he really appreciated it.  I didn't think for a second that he could possibly be gay, but I could see others thinking that.  I see flowers as something that can bring joy and comfort, but if men drew flowers all the time they would be considered weak or too sensitive. 
Just one thought about society influencing gender roles.